Me Want Food: Sesame Noodles in Five Easy Steps

So, here's the thing. I cook. A LOT. A big part of Jewish culture is sharing meals with friends, and consequently, I spend a large portion of time searching for and refining great, easy recipes. I rarely share them here, because, well, there are literally thousands of actual food blogs. But I got to thinking that perhaps the occasional easy -- and I do mean easy -- recipe post was something people might (might?)  like. Maybe? I don't know! My track record of Sticking With Things here is spotty at best, but I'm excited about this. To kick this new endeavor off, I'd like to share the following dish (originally posted over at Aiming Low); it's one of my favorite sides to make, ever, and pretty much everyone with whom I've shared the recipe has loved it.

While it was well-received when I posted it there, things took a turn for the hilarious when a series of random commenters took great pains to tell me how ugly my thumbs were. I really hadn't KNOWN I had ugly thumbs until the post, but honestly, they're right-- I do have ugly thumbs. So, if you missed it over there, enjoy it here! Come for the recipe, stay for the...ugly thumb pictures:
 
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I don’t know about you, but I’m one of those people who not only enjoys, but PREFERS her Chinese food cold, and straight from the fridge. Possibly eaten literally IN the fridge, door open, and with one of my kids’ Backyardigans forks. Because it was the closest utensil, you see.

“Elegance is leaaaaaarned….”

ANYway, I recently came across a recipe for cold sesame noodles that has many things going for it. It’s SIMPLE. It has six ingredients, it’s easy to memorize, and it takes maybe 15 minutes to make (that includes cooking time for the noodles). It’s delicious, and it tastes even better the next day. SCORE. Here it is, in five steps:

(Actual recipe appears below.)

Step 1: Boil a box of pasta. Note that it’s difficult to get a good picture of BOILING WATER.




Step 2: While the pasta is cooking, pull out your main ingredients (soy sauce, sugar, sesame oil), and shake ‘em up. NO, that’s not one of my son’s Silly Bandz that I found on the table, absentmindedly put on, and promptly forgot about until after I took this picture. I don’t even know what the hell you’re saying.






Step 3: Note that in your attempts to artistically capture your Magical Cooking Experience, you’ve effed up your counters. Because you are a winner.


Step 4: Drain pasta, rinse, toss with sauce…*




…And throw in some chopped scallions and sesame seeds. I don’t know how many. Just….SOME, okay? The rules are, THERE ARE NO RULES. Go nuts.





Step 5: Toss it all up/shake it up in the plastic bag (lazy cook’s preferred method of choice, ahoy!) and let sit in the fridge for a few hours to chill. DEVOUR!



Cold Sesame Noodles
Adapted from The Kosher Palette (a cookbook beloved by both me and Ali.)
1 lb. spaghetti-type noodles (I find thin linguini works best)
1/2 cup sesame oil
1/2 cup soy sauce (I sometimes add an extra 1/4 cup; totally depends on your taste/soy sauce brand)
1/3 cup sugar
3-5 scallions, chopped
Sesame seeds, to taste (I use about 1/4 cup)
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Boil water. Add pasta, stirring every so often so it doesn’t get clumpy. (Appetizing!) While pasta is cooking, shake up/thoroughly mix together soy sauce, sesame oil, and sugar. Chop scallions.
When pasta is done, drain, and rinse. Toss together with the sauce, scallions, and sesame seeds until well-blended. Let sit in fridge for a few hours until cool. Enjoy!

*Because I have a tiny fridge, I do this in a Ziploc bag, and try to smoosh out most of the air. It takes up less real estate in the refrigerator, and really lets the sauce soak into the pasta.

I may frame this.

I tweeted this earlier this week, but you know what? It's never not a good time to bear this in mind:

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Earworms

I can find no cohesive theme that allows this list to make any sort of sense, but regardless, here's what's running through my head of late:


1. Angel Taylor - "Sex on Fire" (Kings of Leon cover; this was the best version I could find here, but an "official" version of her rendition is up on iTunes.)



2. Rachael Yamagata - "Duet" (Awesome graphics on this fake...video...thing, no?If I had access to this song, a video program, and YouTube at the age of 14, I probably would've come up with this.)



3. Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros - "Home" (This just feels like it belongs in a Quentin Tarantino movie, doesn't it?)



4. The Go! Team - "The Power Is On" (So WHAT that I first heard it on on an NFL commercial? It makes me want to run and/or punch someone in the face. In a...good way?)



5.  Kanye West - "Power" (Oh, Kanye. I wish I could quit you. This SNL version was amazing.)



6. Glee - "Toxic" (Britney Spears cover. While I firmly believe that the character of Mr. Schue ruins everything good, ever, I begrudgingly admit I don't hate him as much here.)



And what's stuck in your brain lately? Mama needs some new music. (Note: I am Mama in this scenario.) As you can see, I like...everything.

The Hunger Games Rap, and other stuff

Elsewhere this week...

• Were you thinking that what the world was missing was a rap about The Hunger Games? No? Hmm. Well, regardless, *I* thought it was, and I guest-posted at MamaPop yesterday, sharing it there. I'm... well, I'm at a point where I genuinely believe I could take Justin Bieber in a freestyle rap battle. i AM COMING FOR YOU, BIEBER.

 

• I am scared of my freezer. Or, more specifically, using it for planned-ahead meal storage bidness. Naturally, I consulted our genius readers at Aiming Low, and the comments are chock-full of brilliant advice and guidance for how to become A Freezer Person.

• I assess some favorite eye creams at BlogHer Style.

Have a fantastic weekend!

The Ladies of Mad Men Pop Quiz!

Every year around this time, I drag myself to my closet, and face facts: it's fall, for real this time, and I need to pack away my light summer dresses and airy skirts, and lug out the Chunky Wool Pile. Oh, Chunky Wool Pile. So we meet again. And I try -- really, I do -- to stay focused on the task at hand, but instead of diligently swapping out this suit for that, and tearfully boxing up my sandals, I just start TRYING EVERYTHING ON. And what's worse, is I, um, play dress up. And not "let's go to a fancy party" dress up, which is at least somewhat normal, but rather, "let's dress like actual TV characters!" dress up. What I am, it must be acknowledged, is a master of procrastination.

I started pulling out a tweed dress, packed away since last spring, and realized it was absurdly Mad Men. I folded up a tie-collar shirt, and realized it, too, was insanely Mad Men. After mentioning my activities on Twitter, a few people asked for photographic evidence. Who am I to deny anyone? Particularly when it means even MORE procrastination from the drudgery of the task at hand?

J and I, obviously, had our standard conversation where I explained to him that I need a photo shoot for something really, really stupid, and he was all, "right, but how is this helping you with the whole cleaning out your closet thing, which you started to do two hours ago? With much enthusiasm, might I add?" Thankfully, I had the old "well, YOU DREW A GIANT J ON YOUR MATTRESS FOR CRISSAKES, we all DO THINGS OTHERS DON'T UNDERSTAND, J" ace in the hole to get him to acquiesce. Strategy! I am basically Sun Tzu, is what I'm saying. 

And so, I bring you...The Ladies of Mad Men Pop Quiz! I have been known to do this before,.  and I find the pop quiz aspect really brings something to the table, and by something, I mean "nothing, really, I just like the idea of quizzes about stupid things."

Go on, guess who I am in the following pictures:

 

Eyes on your own paper!

Oh, come on. You try to come up with a more reasonable explanation.

 Scene:  An Ad Pitch at The Cheez-It Offices

Merle, the Bitter Ad Exec: So, let me set the scene for you, Chad. Show you what I've come up with.

Chad, the Rich Cheez-It Executive: [fiddles with iPhone] Sure, whatever, all ears!

MTBAE: There's a scientist-type guy, and you know he's a science guy because he's wearing a white lab coat.

CTRCIE: OOOOEEEEE, you wily little pig! My angry birds shall get your wooden lair with th--er, uh...loving this so far!

MTBAE: Also the science guy is talking to a giant wheel of cheese.

CTRCIE: SOLID GOLD.

MTBAE: However, no one will know what he's saying, or have any idea as to the intended focus and goal of the commercial, because there will be a bright red sign, smack-dab in the middle of the screen that says MATURATION ROOM in itty-bitty letters. And no one, anywhere, ever, has used that phrase, but because it is written in such itty-bitty letters, it looks like it's a sign for an entirely different and much dirtier type of room. And lo, the sign shall distract them, and they'll be all, "WAIIIIIT a minute, what does that say? HAHAHAHAAAAAAA," and you know what, Chad? You know what? I am doing this to eff with you because you SLEPT WITH MY WIFE,  CHAD! YOU SPOILED BASTARD CHEEZ-IT SCION SON OF A BITCH! I KNOW IT WAS YOU! Estelle was my world! And you took her, just like you take everything ! You've had everything handed to you! Everything! *sobs*

CTRCIE: [not paying attention] Sure, dude! Awesome! Run with it!

~Fin~

Annnnnnnnd, that's how we got this. I mean, I am assuming. WHAT OTHER EXPLANATION COULD THERE BE?

(Um, I'm not the only one who saw a different word at first glance, right? Right?)

Elsewhere...

Thank you all so much for the sweet birthday wishes. Here's what else I was up to last week:

• Addressing some ridiculous beauty products over at BlogHer Style

• Talking about my unfortunate Dubious Superpower at Aiming Low

and finally, this...

•  Likely the first and last time anything I have ever done will be mentioned in a Smart Spending article (Baby Gaga FTW!)